How to properly store a Xmas tree
The book said it would fit. I burned the book too.
Step 1. Remove and carefully pack all ornaments.
Step 2. Wait 3 days.
Step 3. Drink heavily, wait 2 more days.
Step 4. Take tree apart and make 4 unsuccessful attempts to fit a bowling ball in a matchbox.
Step 5. Take tree outside to “pack more effectively.”
Step 6. Once out of site, burn tree.
Step 7. Place remaining poles in outside trash.
The wife is not happy. The husband has been drinking.
